Sunday, July 23, 2017

How to Groom a Groom Classes (Part1)

Ethics classes at Loreto college, in the third year, are different.

Quite... different...

As a young lady, the extent of your education or skill set should not depend upon how well you can cook "butter chicken" or how nicely you drape your saree.

To be honest, I can't do either very well.

But the bottom line is that I'm willing to learn all of that, for my sake and not for the purpose of bagging the next best groom on an online match-making website.

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Gender based qualifications required for marriage:

Sister (our principal), started class by reciting a few posts put up on a certain match making website.

Interestingly...the guy's resume would go something like this...."Tall banker/engineer/doctor/etc. earning --- of 40 years, coming from well educated Brahmin/Kshatriya family. Looking for fair complexioned, 5'4" or taller girl between ages 20-30, coming from good Brahmin family."

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And vice versa for the prospective bride's ad.
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Therefore...

In India or say most other places...the educational as well as economic qualifications of a prospective groom would matter most. 

While at the same time, the prospective bride should definitely be a great beauty disregarding her aptitude for a job or her annual/monthly income. 

When Sister asked what kind of a guy do you Young Ladies like?

Out of a class of about 260 final year students...we came up with only 3 physical characteristics, which were again subjective to different perspectives.

When it came to morals, beliefs, ideas and personality attributes though... My batch mates surprised even themselves.

We came up with a total of 53 personality related attributes and values.

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I asked the guys as well:


Men, of course, I don't want you to feel left out. 

So I tried asking a few male friends, what their kind of "woman" would be.

When they said "men are physical creatures", they weren't kidding.

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Apparently to notice a woman you first look for their physical aspects and then... If they feel she is fun to be around... will they make the effort to stay around.

Then again, in the long term, most guys believe their woman should have her own sense of individuality and independence.

In the end:

All our choices vary. No two people are the same. Men and women do differ though.

From the way they think about matters, to the way they operate. 

But, that does not mean you bring in your prejudices into the next level of a relationship.

Before you even consider getting married, you would have to establish yourself as an individual who can actually operate on your own.

Otherwise, what is the point of bringing in the extra responsibility that comes from being a couple.?

Ladies, you do not need an excuse to stay single. It's a choice, just like any other and you're the one who's ultimately going to have to make it.

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